Greg Gutfeld: The best ideas come from you

Gutfeld: This is where the best ideas come from

‘Gutfeld’ panel discusses a fan idea called the ‘MLK Dream Score,’ which would grade politicians and candidates based on how closely they align to principles put forth in MLK’s ‘I Have A Dream Speech.’

So last Saturday I did a live show in Birmingham, Alabama. It was a great time, had by all, especially me. Whoever sent the three little people strippers to my trailer after the show was greatly appreciated. It’s amazing what they can get up to, when you stack ’em. Like a sleeve of Ritz crackers

But that’s the thing about doing these live shows. People give me things. And not just cold sores. They give stuffed unicorns, home-baked brownies, a sketch of me half-naked lying on a bearskin rug. That came from Pete Hegseth. I remember posing for that sketch. He, in the role of Jack and me as Rose in “Titanic.”

My point is I get a lot of stuff handed to me, and it’s impossible to look at them all. Usually, I leave some behind. Except the ones I can smuggle onto the plane, then gently remove in the bathroom. 

But Saturday – a gentleman handed me an envelope stuffed with paper. It’s something I would normally have someone else open. Last thing I need is another marriage proposal from some stranger. 

Remember this guy? What happened to him. He came and went, like a Jets head coach.

Picture of man holding a marriage proposal at a baseball game

But guys, remember if you’re going to propose, you gotta put a ring on it – and I don’t mean my finger.

But since I already had a fifth of gin, I decided to open the envelope, and lo and behold, it wasn’t a death threat or some mysterious white powder. Sorry about that, Kat. It was a letter from Jim Burns, formerly in charge of “solution architecture of Microsoft.”

Essentially, his job was to come up with solutions for problems. It’s a weird job, because once you come up with a solution, you’re out of a job. It’s why Democrats will work forever.

But he sent me an idea that smacked me in the face harder than Moe hitting Curly. It’s called “the MLK dream score,” which would grade political candidates based on their adherence to Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech. Now, how simple is that? It’s as simple as Eric Swalwell. And it would be easier to implement than my shoe lifts.

But it tackles the gulf between people who claim they have your best interests at heart, but then screw you over like a s***** weatherman. It describes every leftwing leader in the last two decades.

As Burns points out, there is no quick and accurate way to assess a candidate’s suitability for Blacks – because they’ve been hoodwinked into voting for Dems who spout principles that sound good, but then enact policies completely contrary to MLK’s vision. It’s politics in a left-wing nutshell.

People weigh the eloquence of speeches much more heavily than their actions. This is why Obama was so popular – he nailed it on charisma, but his policies did less for Blacks than the casting director for “Friends.” You could say that about everyone from Jesse Jackson to “The Squad.”

Compare that to Trump – who to be honest – his delivery wasn’t that great, at times. But even when Trump was as eloquent as Rasputin without the sex appeal, his policies were more helpful to Blacks than any modern-era president. In one breath he might call the NFL kneelers sons of bitches, in the next, create the lowest unemployment for Blacks in modern history. 

You see? It goes back to “words versus deeds”. Trump always nailed the deeds but gave fodder to his critics with the words. It was harder for him to resist media bait than Brian Stelter is with a Twinkie casserole.

The “MLK dream score” solves this problem by scoring candidates using the principles embodied in the MLK speech. And it’s easy. You create a website — “MLK dream score dot com” which has the actual speech – and then a scorecard – with a selectable map of the country. You can visit your state, find your candidate, and their dream score. It’s like a fantasy football league for politicians.

If it’s high, it would show a happy MLK. If it’s low – angry. And all candidates would be treated the same, regardless of race. In other words, they would be judged on the content of their policies, not the color of their skin. Sure charisma might count for something, but not a lot. After all, this is about finding a great leader, not the next “American Idol.”

So, Obama would get a low score, because although he was cool, his policies left Blacks cold. Biden would score zero, for excusing physical violence at protests, creating polarization by branding people racist, and having no interest in a “beautiful symphony of brotherhood.” 

But Winsome Sears would kick ass. Because her words are consistent with MLK’s speech principles about character. Deeds are weighted vs words. What a great way to gauge a leader. It would literally get rid of every liberal mayor in days – if not seconds.

This is the first time I’ve ever done a monologue based on something a fan gave me, other than a fake phone number. But it shows you where great ideas come from. They come from you.

When you sit down and you think hard, you will be surprised what comes out of you. Especially if you do your best thinking on the toilet.

This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld’s opening monologue on the November 16, 2021 edition of “Gutfeld!”

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